An Ode to Letting Go


“What we have once enjoyed we can never lose. All that we loved deeply becomes part of us”. Helen Keller

As I was looking through a year end summary report that the WordPress sends to every blogger, I came to a surprising discovery, my number one single post last year, and ever since it was written in the Summer of 2012, has nothing to do with food (judging by the search words that led to the post and other indicators). It’s about letting go of love and dealing with a heartbreak that led most blog visitors to this post True Love Means Letting Go. 

The post vas visited by an astonishing number of 23,341 times in just 18 months ever since it was written. That means that potentially there were 46,682 broken hearts during that time (as it always takes two to tango, no matter how lightly you think the other person took the breakup). I sincerely hope many of those hearts have healed since then, and maybe some even found new love, but the stream of visitors never seems to seize, I get hits on it every single day, in multiple numbers, that means that somebody somewhere is learning to let go.

I myself have gone through this lesson way too many times, you can even say I’ve perfected the theme and earned my PhD in it. The quote by Helen Keller is my favorite, as long before I discovered it, I was actually living it. Another great quote says that kindness is love in action with the work boots on. I’ve had my boots on and “worked” them ever since I can remember myself. 

Letting go is incredibly hard, preserving the positive about the relationship (and acting upon it) is even more difficult, but if you can’t turn toward your former partner 5, 10 or even a year from now and still say “I love you”, then it wasn’t love. You can also say “we’ve grown apart, or we want different things in life, or even you’re not a good partner for me”, but if you can’t start the sentence with loving words, know that what you had was just a passing feeling. True unconditional love has no expiration date, it should always transform into some other positive action, kindness, forgiveness, acceptance. If hatred developed, then where did the love go? The loving energy can only be used for love, it becomes completely void at a glimpse of anything malicious.

Venus is currently in retrograde, until January 31st, a time of reflection and review during any planet retrograde is always a great idea. Venus governs relationships, all kinds and not just romantic, so if you wanted to retrieve a bit, there’s no better time than now. And even if you are not, take a cue from the planets to revisit and review your past connections.

With all the people that we meet throughout our life and some who we let go, by the time we are old, our hearts should look like a quilt, made of all the great loves that we ever had, of all the men, women, children and animals that touched us deeply, and of all the wounds of loss that we ever had but were able to patch them and move on. I know my heart will be exactly like that.

Today’s post is not about food, in honor of the one that’s not popular because of the recipe. You can pour yourself a drink and you can put some music on, whatever inspires you to heal and continue on your journey. To all the men who I loved deeply and let go, some of you are still in my life in some other ways, and some are gone for now or forever, I’d never be the same without you, and I know that a memory of me is always accompanied by a smile, and that’s exactly how I want to be remembered!