Cry Me A River


The past few weeks were full of tears. I wish I’d tell you only in a figurative way, but I was actually literary crying. Whatever happened to my back at the end of July, and then whatever else made it worse last Thursday, but I’m now stuck at home (crying), barely able to move and feeling completely miserable. 🙁

I’ve had my share of aches and pains from all the prior surgeries, chemo, illnesses, so if I’m crying from pain, it’s pretty bad, a 10-pointer, topped only by labor pains (which I know as I had a natural childbirth up until the moment they had to do a C-section), so cry me a river indeed…

I don’t know about you, some people need a lot of distraction and entertainment to keep their mind off their illness, but if I feel very sick, and especially if in pain, I have to kind of retrieve from the outside world and go “inside”, first to cope with all the symptoms and use the energy to stay focused and not to fall apart and become hopeless, and partially to save myself from taking out anger and frustration on other people who just happen to be around. I remember just laying curved in a ball and silent for days after each chemo treatment, TV was on playing something on the background, my mom was nearby talking, keeping my spirits up, but I was deep inside my own world, concentrating on each breath, trying not to scream and not to cry. Maybe I simply should have…

Yes, I’m on two different pain meds right now and just started physical therapy, but I mainly wish this “pain in the ass period” would just end as abruptly as it began. A girl can dream right?!

What’s Cooking This Week

Not much was cooking this week due to pain issues and generally feeling crabby, but since standing and walking for a bit made the pain somewhat better (and had me feeling more like a normal functioning human), I did manage to spend some time in the kitchen after all. The recipe below does list some ingredients that are potentially “tears producing”, but they work well with the rest to create a quite tasty dish. And that’s all that should count at the end.

Scallion Salmon Cakes


1 1/2 lbs of salmon fillet

2 medium potatoes

1/4 cup of bread crumbs (I used gluten free ones)

2 Tbspoons of mayo

1 Tbspoons of Worcestershire sauce (make sure it’s gluten free)

2-3 spears of scallions, chopped

1 tspoon of seasoning  (I used French seasoning blend)

lemon juice, salt, pepper, oil for frying


Season salmon fillet with salt, pepper, lemon juice, wrap potatoes in foil and bake all at 375 degrees till the salmon is half way done and potatoes are soft but not overly mushy (you’ll need more time for potatoes than for salmon). Let both cool off a bit and separate salmon fillet from the skin and mix with peeled and mashed potatoes.


Add mayo, Worcestershire sauce, bread crumbs, chopped scallions, seasonings/salt and pepper and form salmon patties.


Heat up oil and fry them on both sides till ready. They are great as a main course paired with salad or any side dish you want or for a hot sandwich topped with vegetables and tartar sauce or honey mustard.